Ok so I got a bunch of angry emails today… I mean REALLY angry. There is a perception in one that I I am misleading them, in another that I go too far, in another that I am disrespectful. Phew it was a lot…
Now, I had a couple of choices in the many moments I received these I can get angry right back, I can take it personally, I can change what I am doing and how I am shining my light and be at the affect, or I can see that many are hurting right now and just need some love and compassion. I can perhaps see that I have some anger that I am ready to let go of and do my own work around this since this is what I am attracting–It was unusual to receive so many in one day so I knew something was up.
So what did I do? A little of everything <grin>.
I had a knee jerk reaction of being hurt… "gosh I am just trying to make a living while getting this information to as many as possible." Do you hear "victim" in that statement. Isn't it amazing how we can fool ourselves? I was justifying that they are wrong and I am right and making myself into a victim at the same time. So THAT wasn't going to work.
Next I went to Ho'oponopono… part one: taking responsibility… have I ever had a triggered moment where I proverbially "shot the messenger"… huh, yeah a bunch of times. So this is a great opportunity to; "I'm sorry (that something inside of me needs to use anger as a coping mechanism), please forgive me (for those who I may have hurt through thought, word, or deed by using this anger in the past), thank you (for showing up to show me what I am ready to work on and release), and I love you (just because). Check out the post for the full Ho'oponopono prayer that I use with my dialoging technique.
Next I went inside my body and looked around asking into the areas that felt hurt and into the areas that felt anger. I worked with those areas did some re-patterning hung out with aspects of myself that needed attention and went deeper. I used it to explore and bring me out of victim mode and into the moment.
Then I was able to be in a state where I could see that those emails were just a lashing out from someone feeling overwhelmed and coming from a place of their own trauma. They, we, I, are divine love, and we each deserve the love that we are, for there is nothing else really.
Then I received emails from twice as many that said the opposite of
what the few had sent. One told me of their teenage son who based on
the conversation with Dr. Meg is looking at his actions in a new way.
Another of how they cried and released some big old baggage because of
the healing they experienced during the call I did tonight for Hilton Johnson, and dozens more thanking me for offering so much for free when they are struggling.
Not that I needed these emails but that is what I was now open to
receiving by moving myself into a new place, a place of peace.
So many of you ask me how to cope with the wild and crazy ride we are on right now. This story above is one way, and as Meg said in Tuesday's call… accept and live intentionally. I would add use what is in front of you to reach new depths / heights.
Thanks for listening and hope you know that we are all trying to sort things out… you are not alone!
This post was interestingly appropriate for me. The other day I had a rather bizarre encounter with a total stranger. She felt that I’d parked in such a way that I was deliberately blocking her driveway (I did check when I parked and thought I was clear enough that if someone needed to get in or out they’d be okay, but apparently I made an error in judgment on the distances).
It was an encounter that should have been over in three sentences. She was waiting for me by my car, and she complained and told me not to block her drive way any more. I apologised and assured her it wouldn’t happen again. She proceeded with more verbal abuse, and the more I apologised, the more irate she became. She started going on about how I always did this (I’ve never parked in front of her house before!) and about how “you people” (meaning, parents who have children at the elementary school just up the
street, who park there when picking up their kids) are always doing this to her and about how selfish I am and on and on. She actually called me a liar! She just would not accept my sincere apology (and it was sincere). I was truthful, I was honest, I was non-confrontational, but what she actually wanted was just someone to abuse for her real or perceived victimisation. I finally had to just get in the car and leave, because nothing I said helped the situation.
I was, to put it mildly, quite shaken by the encounter. I have Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, and the encounter (which I would classify as verbal assault) triggered a pretty nasty anxiety attack, so I had to work through that. I also had to think about what I did to create it or draw it to myself, and what I did to contribute to it. I had to work through anger and fear and forgiveness of myself and this woman I’d never met before.
I went through similar steps as you, although I didn’t do the Ho’oponopono at the time (have now that I read this post, though, it’s perfect for a situation like this).
It’s surprisingly traumatic to be called a liar and verbally attacked by a complete
stranger! However, this post had given me a lot of really good ideas on how to proceed and how to get to a place of understanding of both myself and this other person. I hope to end it with healing and a blessing for us both.
Thanks for posting. It was timely.
Hello Jennifer, I wanted to thank you for the work you do. You are coming straight from the heart and I love the way you have impacted my life. I just wanted to say thank you and that I look forward to receiving your emails.